Reasons My Stepson Thinks I Took Lessons From Cinderella's Step-Mother

1.) Me: SS, you put the milk in the fridge without the cap on it again.
    SS: Ok, I'll get it later.
    Me: Um, no, I want milk later and I want it to be just as tasty as when I bought it this morning. Put it on now.

2.)Me: SS, can you please put the pictures back that you were looking at?
    SS: what pictures?
    Me: The snapshots from our Rhode Island Trip? The ones that are scattered across the coffee table with a cat laying on them?
    SS: (not moving): Oh yeah. Those pictures.
    Me: Funny. They're still on the coffee table. Now, SS
 
3.) He's just gotten out of the shower
    Me: Did you put on the same shirt you slept in?
    SS: yeah, I didn't bring anything else to wear.
    Me: And, um...you've got the play today? In like an hour and a half?
    SS, very tired of me and my questions: yeah
    Me: Would you like a clean shirt?
    SS: {The Biggest Sigh I have heard since my brother first perfected the art fifteen years ago}
    Me: {The Biggest Sigh I have given since I was an expert on it fifteen years ago.}

And he's only been awake for an hour and a half.
I'm sure I could be much meaner today, but he'll be gone for about 11 hours, so I'll just have to save it up for the next time we have him.
Of course, the $20 we gave him to go to lunch a movie in between plays today helped ease him back to civility. But I can only buy his love so often before I start feeling cheap.