Sunday, March 30, 2008

The Tudors: Blowing off some steam

Last year, The Tudors broke on Showtime, starring a completely yummiliscious Jonathan Rhys Meyers, someone I once thought I could watch reading the alphabet backwards for hours on end. Apparently, I can't watch him play Le Roi Henri. Which is sad on so many levels, but I think I'm going to just focus on why this makes me angry. Henry VIII life was dramatic. It was romantic, tragic, creative, inventive, volatile and about 1 kajillion other adjectives that I could list. It is really a story so unbelievable, that if it hadn't been so well documented due to the fact that he was a king (who kept killing wives and started a new religion, among other things), no one WOULD believe it. It's Hollywood come to life, only in the past. Before there was Hollywood. So why, Mr. Screenwriter, did you have to go and mess with it? I don't just mean it has something semi-annoying to people in the know like people using stirrups before they were invented. I mean people (Henry's illegitimate son) being born years too early, and then dying much younger (by about 20 years) than he actually did. I mean the wrong sister (of Henry) marrying the king of France. I mean putting a main character (Wolsey) in prison and having him commit suicide when he did NO SUCH THING. I mean the fact that they found a black haired-30 year old yummy-looking-drool worthy specimen to play a man that was 42 years old with reddish hair and - let's face it - the beginnings of a portly body. And didn't even try to disguise the fact that they look nothing alike, which in Hollywood is fairly easy to do these days. (probably because if they added 30 pounds of fat and some hair dye, most of the women swooning over the show would never have watched it in the first place). I think I can't watch it because I love the real story so much, there's so many shades of meaning and real-life dramas there - especially in Anne's story - and they've come close enough to touch the real thing - all of which centered on Henry's power, charm, charisma - and then WAM! They throw out something crazy. And I'll be honest - listening to The Professor yell at the TV takes something away from the whole thing a bit. I mean, what if someone wrote a series about the founding of the US, only they had George Washington winning every battle he set foot in? Or had Ben Franklin as the first president of the US? And why can't I turn off my brain and just be able to stare into JRM beautiful eyes for an hour?

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