Saturday, November 03, 2007

Unoriginal Thoughts on Semi-Parenthood

Stepson went to a college football game a couple of hours away today. After the game, he went to a friend's house to meet up with a group and hang out and watch yet another football game. Besides the fact that I don't quite understand the need to watch all this football... For the first time in this roller coaster ride titled "Step Mother-Hood", he has a curfew. I was caught a little unaware. Holy hell, I'm setting a curfew? He's never needed one before. I'd stay up til 3 AM every night if given the chance. How in the world did I get in this position? His girlfriend is there, of course. It's still 2 hours before curfew. His best friend is responsible for getting him home. I'm thinking about all of this a little bit more than I anticipated. Who's there? How many adults are present? What's the ratio of teenagers to adults? The time changes tonight. Exactly what time is he supposed to be home again? I'm very lucky. I have a very responsible and worry-wart type of stepson. But.... He's 16. Out with friends. They all have their drivers licenses. Now, I remember very well the kind of completely innocent fun I had at that age. I'm really not the worrying type. He has good judgement for a 16 year old. It's that "for a 16 year old" part that has me thinking twice. The transition from worrying about his every move to trying to worry only about those moves that I have direct influence on...it's a little disconcerting. I am LOVING watching him grow into an adult. Into someone that can have a conversation that ranges beyond "What's for dinner?". And I love knowing that he's out there making the wonderful memories that I have of being 16 with no worries. So why am I sitting here wondering what he's doing? He's becoming his own person. And that means not sharing every little detail of his life. I'm going to miss those details. And I'm going to be sitting on the couch with a stopwatch in about one hour and 45 minutes.

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